What Can’t You Teach? 47 If you have a character trait, say, honesty, you have had to come to grips over the years with its upside and its downside. People ap- preciate you for being honest, but not when they ask you if they look good after they have spent an hour dressing (I speak from experience here). People dislike dishonesty but not when it helps get a deal closed because you said you loved a restaurant that you really hated. We have mixed feelings about honesty, as we do about any personality charac- teristic. We like friendly people but we dislike overly friendly people. Who decides which is which is anybody’s guess. Teenagers often try to be all things to all people, but as adults they soon realize that they simply will have to be themselves and they will try to find work and friends that suit the personalities that they happen to have. Personality features are not conscious. We don’t decide which ones to have and we may not even be aware of how others perceive us. We do what we feel comfortable doing and we push on. And then we meet integrity and compliance officers. They tell us to read every detail of a contract to make sure we are in compliance, and those who are detail-oriented and fearful of mak- ing errors and introverted and sensitive do it without question, and those people who are gregarious and confident and aggressive figure they can get by without it. What is an integrity and compliance officer to do? Here is what not to do: e Don’t try to tell people who naturally act one way to act differently. e Don’t make a movie of the idiot who did it wrong and say, See, look how dumb that guy was and look what trouble he got into. e Don’t lecture on the benefits of behaving the way the company wants you to behave. e Don’t write a manual with correct behavior that no one will read. e Don’t build an e-learning course with multiple choice answers where one of them is the right thing to do. The mind is organized around experiences. We remember our e