HOUSE OVERSIGHT 023557 ********* for great dirty jokes 24/7, Use Your Finger! (516) 922-WINE free jokes for The Universe since 1979 ... simply dial (516) 922-9463 ... ... not a pay service, just a regular call ... 36 years of free jokes! ******* Every night for twenty years, Irving Schwartz gets down on his knees and says, "Lord, it's me, Irving Schwartz. I'm a good Jewish boy. One time, couldn't you let me win the lottery? One time? I'm good to my parents, I'm good to my children, I go to temple. Please, Lord, please, one time, let me win the lottery." He's on his knees every night for twenty years. "Lord, it's me, Irving Schwartz. Would you please let me, sometime, win the lottery?" Finally one night after twenty years, the heavens open up, and God says, "Irv, if you want to win the lottery, you've got to buy a fucking ticket." ******** this is The JokeLand E-Mail List. if you're not supposed to be on this train, please disembark & get off now. ... and please tell anybody who wants to get on to e-mail me, jokelandeaol.com ******** What's hairy and bites necks? Cunt Dracula. ********** An old guy with Parkinson's goes into an ice-cream parlor and says, "I-I'd like an ice cream, p-please ..." The girl behind the counter says, "What flavor would you like?" The guy says, "I-it don't matter, I-I'm gonna drop it anyway." ********* Schneider walks into a shoe store and asks for a pair of size 8 tie shoes. The salesman says, "But, sir, I can see from up here you're at least a size 11."