made mistakes, so there are moments in Sex Positive that I wish I could clarify -- but it's not my film. That's why I'm thrilled that you're giving me the first opportunity to address the moments that make me cringe when I see the movie -- and what amazed me is that you nailed most of them. Me -- pressured into S&M? Hell, no. I stumbled across BDSM porn in college, and was both appalled and more turned on than I was to any other porn. I pursued a few experiences as a novice when I was in college, and I was completely turned off to the scene for years. The few Tops I met were clumsy, distracted by fetishes that bored me, and I was convinced a bottom could easily get hurt -- so I walked away. When I began hustling in NYC, I was an angry activist and it attracted S&M bottoms that were happy to teach me what I could do with my anger that was erotic and consensual. To that I added what I had learned that Tops did wrong -- and presto! I got really good at it fast -- and I loved it. I was doing two or three scenes a day, but because I could often steer a scene to what turned me on, it felt more like play than work. If I hadn't had been trained as a Top by older, experienced bottoms who were hiring me, I still would have had S&M experiences on my own. But I doubt that I would have gotten as heavily into the scene if it wasn't for hustling. That's where I earned my S&M PhD. In 1979, S&M was considered the fallback scene for aging hustlers -- it was what you turned to when you were losing your youth. There was such a dearth of good Tops. But I had the raw material to be a great Top at 23, and I built quite a reputation on word-of- mouth referrals and repeats. Many of my clients became close friends. CT: Where do you place BDSM in your sexual identity and self-conception? Do you see it as deeply part of you, or something you chose? Do you think of your BDSM urges as coming from a place as deep, as intrinsic, as your gay orientation? RB: I think it's too late for me to answer t