car wash,” involving, as one veteran swinger portrays it, “a lot of naked bodies and some serious rubbing.” But the ABC regulations on Attire and Conduct—behavior “deemed contrary to public welfare and morals, and therefore no on-sale license shall be held at any premises where such conduct or acts are permitted” —includes this clause as a no-no: “To encourage or permit any person on the licensed premises to touch, caress or fondle the breasts, buttocks, anus or genitals of any other person.” The Wyndham chickens out, the massage clinic is canceled, the money is refunded, Lifestyles will sue the hotel for breach of contract, and next year’ s convention will be held in Las Vegas in 1998. A lawyer, standing on the border of cynicism, suggests, “Just buy a town in Mexico and buy off all the officials.” In the previous year, 1996, the convention was held at the Town & Country Hotel in San Diego (for the fourth time), but two ABC officers claimed that they witnessed oral copulation in the convention hall, and the hotel’ s liquor license was suspended for five days, hence Lifestyle’ s move to Palm Springs this year. Lately, ABC has been spreading its particular brand of paranoia in Los Angeles, where the agency has raided gay, black and Latino bars in Los Angeles and in Hermosa Beach, where it HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_015202