decide that my opening line will then be, “I just want to say that freedom of expression existed long before the First Amendment.” Though it’ s not my motivation, | realize that this opening line will undoubtedly please Robert McGinley, the bearded co-founder and president of the Lifestyles Organization. “We hate government intervention in our lives,” he has assured me. “We hate censorship. We’ re against laws that require helmets for cyclists. It’ s good that a law was just passed allowing women to breastfeed in public, but we shouldn’ t need permission from the government to do it.” He admits to being “libertarian, but not Libertarian Party.” He draws his philosophy from Jack London— “The proper function of man is to live, not to exist” —and, more specifically, his credo is “Adult sexuality is normal.” Dr. McGinley (he holds a Ph.D. in counseling psychology) tells me a riddle: “What do you call an Italian swinger?” | give up. The answer: “A swop.” At the luncheon, it turns out that | will mot be presented with the Freedom Award after all, and | have to come up immediately with a replacement opening line: “I'’ m delighted to be at the Lifestyles Convention—this is the first convention I’ ve ever been to that was named after a condom.” HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_015199